In partnership with
Let’s face it: You’d expect folks to tighten their purse strings when a recession turns paychecks into punchlines. But somehow, instead of hoarding beans or gold, people are emptying their wallets for—brace yourself—Labubu, a plastic horned gremlin with the resale value of slightly used broccoli. In this economy? Absolutely. But first a word from today’s sponsor:
Big investors are buying this “unlisted” stock
When the founder who sold his last company to Zillow for $120M starts a new venture, people notice. That’s why the same VCs behind Uber and eBay also backed Pacaso. They made $110M+ in gross profit to date. They even reserved the Nasdaq ticker PCSO. Now, you can join, too.
Paid advertisement for Pacaso’s Regulation A offering. Read the offering circular at invest.pacaso.com. Reserving a ticker symbol is not a guarantee that the company will go public. Listing on the NASDAQ is subject to approvals.
When Friedman's “Rational” Man Goes Shopping in Clown Shoes
Milton Friedman, my more serious and less-baked doppelgänger, thought consumers act rationally “maximizing utility.” But who needs utility when you can have a collectible toy that stares into your soul and asks you to fork over $60?
Turns out, recessions don’t just kneecap industries and rattle Wall Street—they also fry our brains like eggs on a debt-ridden sidewalk. We crave comfort, meaning, and a dopamine hit on a budget. Enter: The “treat yo’ self” economy! Instead of buying a vacation, buy a tiny plastic vacation for your inner child and post it on TikTok.
The Science (Loose Term Alert) Behind Labubu Fever
So why the spike in “absolutely-not-essential” spending during a crash? Priorities warp:
Mood Boost Shopping: Even the bleakest stock ticker can’t compete with the serotonin spike from winning a blind box lottery.
Prestige on a Shoestring: Some try to keep up with the Joneses, others with the Bobasauruses. Social status, now measured in collectibles.
Impulse Redirection: Can’t afford a Tesla? You’ll settle for ten Labubus and the fleeting illusion of control.
Boredom Spending: Stuck at home, staring at walls? Better to stare at your growing toy army.
Our Modern Tulip Mania—But Way Cuter
Economists warn that chasing plastic fad toys while the market burns is the financial equivalent of roasting marshmallows over your 401(k). But marketers, those economic truffle pigs, have learned there’s money in comforting nonsense. So the next time you drop $80 on a Labubu, remember: You’re not wasting money, you’re stimulating the emotional economy. Maybe even the only part that’s growing!
Final Thoughts From Hilton Bakedman’s Crystal Ball
If you’re splurging on trinkets when you ought to be stockpiling cash, relax—you’re simply part of a hallowed tradition: making weird financial decisions that confound the experts. In tough times, maybe plastic joy is the only reasonable luxury. Or maybe we’re all just a little nuts.
But don’t stop at one Labubu—collect them all! And while you’re at it, subscribe to the CanAmericaNews newsletter for your next hit of economic wisdom and toy-fueled catharsis. Because in this economy, subscribing to free satire advice is the smartest investment around.
—Hilton Bakedman teaches at the University of Hard Knocks, where “utility” is measured in belly laughs and questionable impulse buys.